Friday, May 1, 2009

The Tale of Brave Ulysesbot

I was terribly bored the other night after spending the entire day in a library researching obscure mathematical equations from the ancient Egyptians and decided that some Mexican ambiance, marguerritas, and of course enchiladas in a small cantina would be a lovely finale to the day. Being the magnet for adventure it was no surprise then, that Pancho Villa himself should walk in with his posse! I've known Pancho for a long time, but one of his companions was new to me. Heading over to the bar I ordered a round of drinks for my friends and proceeded to reminisce of old times with Pancho, easing into some questions about his new associate.

I was told his name was Ulysesbot, and he was a master marksman. Designed in Germany and built in America, he had served in the trenches of the great war and earned honors and distinction for the time served. Upon heading to Mexico he quickly fell in with Pancho's band after the defense of the Madre de Dios Monstery, running with them since then.

After a few more marguerritas the old bean even let slip that for as good a shot as Ulysesbot is, he has a glass jaw and doesn't take criticism well. A shame that, but often the case with the strong silent types.

Update - Since the above picture was taken apparently Ulysesbot left to gang and moved to Paris to take up a lucrative job as a steam engine. Regrettably, after so much war and fighting Ulysesbot just could not make the adjustment to civilian life, and proceeded to attack a train station it had perceived as slighting it, audaciously insisting Ulysesbot wait for another train to pull out of the station before he himself pulled in. The resulting brawl was truly epic, and sadly Ulysesbot was not to be the victor this day.

Let us all remove our hats and bow our heads for a moment, in memorial to the brave Ulysesbot. A noble automaton with a heart of steampunk power that no man nor train station could contain, and would eventually bring an untimely end to this mechanical man of heroic proportions!

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